You might be dating a man, who is still in contact with his ex. Although you have pointed him to it, he still thinks it’s no big deal. This has then made a question anchor in your mind: Why do guys stay in touch with ex-girlfriends?
The reason why a guy stays in touch with his ex depends on the guy. He might just want to keep his options open, he still has feelings for her or wants to have sex with her.
So if you are dating a guy that is still in contact with an ex, read this article to find out everything that has to do with a guy contacting his ex.
25 Reasons why guys stay in touch with their ex-girlfriend
1. To keep his options open:
He keeps talking with his ex so she would know he still has eyes for her. So when things don’t work out between you two, it will be easier to go back to her.
2. They are friends now:
If you are asking: Why do guys stay in touch with ex-girlfriends? What if they are just friends now and they are only getting in touch with each other? Moreover, they were friends before they started dating.
3. He still loves her:
When a guy is still in contact with his ex, it might mean that he still has feelings for her or has not fully moved on from the relationship they had.
4. He is trying to use you to make her feel jealous:
When a guy is dating a new girl, he might want to keep his ex so she can see when he is making posts of you on his social media to make her jealous.
5. He is still attracted to her:
It could be sexual or anything, but he is keeping her there because his mind still calls for her.
6. They are still having an affair:
They might be exes to you, but they might still be having something going on. What you see as just getting in touch, might be a serious relationship going on under your nose.
7. They have some unfinished business:
If you started a project with an ex but the relationship ended, it’s only sensible that the project goes on even though the relationship has ended. Your man might still be partnering with his ex because of a project and which is why they keep in touch.
8. He is connected to her family:
When you date people and know all their family, it is usually very difficult to fully end such a relationship. Even when you do, you will still get in contact, especially if things ended on good terms.
9. They just stay in touch:
It could just be nothing more than just staying in touch. If they have kids together they also need to stay in touch.
10. He feels he still owes her something:
Your boyfriend might still be feeling guilty for the way he treated his ex. This will make him feel that it is still his responsibility to always call and text his ex. This could be why they still get in touch.
11. He misses her:
Even if he is dating you now, he might still be missing his ex. So their constant interaction might indicate that he missed her.
12. You are just a rebound:
What if you are just a rebound? When a guy breaks up with someone, he might try to move on very fast into another relationship (you) which does not mean he has moved on. This might be your current situation.
13. He is thinking of getting back to her:
Your boyfriend might be thinking of getting back with his ex, maybe their constant interaction is something for you to worry about.
14. They are friends with benefits:
Some guys might break up with their ex but still have sex with them. If your boyfriend is still having sex with his ex, he will always contact her. Maybe his ex still needs him for financial support, so they will always text each other.
15. He is not happy in your relationship:
He might be dating you but is unhappy with you. This will make him miss his ex and want to text her whenever he remembers how happy he felt when he was with her.
16. To manipulate them:
Some guys just get in touch with their ex because they enjoy the control they have over her. They know she still has feelings for them. They will text her so she cannot move on and still be stuck, wishing he will come back to her.
17. She is his 911:
They were friends before you came. You might be dating him, but his ex must have spent a long time with him and understands him more. Though this is wrong, some guys prefer to tell their ex things happening to them because of the connection they share. For such a guy, she understands him more, and she will be able to relate to what they’re going through.
18. He is still stuck in the past:
He has broken up but has not freed himself from issues of the past. He still misses everything he did with his ex. Or he is still holding on to how he hurts her.
19. He feels it is the right thing to do:
While you are trying to answer: Why do guys stay in touch with ex-girlfriends? You might have even told him about this letting him know how wrong it is, but this man sees nothing wrong with it. And he might even be thinking you are being possessive or trying to control him. To him, it is no big deal to text his ex.
20. They have mutual friends:
If they have mutual friends, it will be difficult for them not to get in touch with each other. This is because they will likely meet when they go for group hangouts.
21. He is just being a nice guy:
Well, maybe this guy is just a nice guy. He believes that when one is not dating someone, the nice thing to do is to always call and check up on them as friends would.
22. She is the one always initiating contact:
It might be that his ex-girlfriend is the one always keeping in touch with him. This is why it looks like they are always contacting each other.
23. He is bored with you:
He might be in a relationship with you, but you don’t give him the vibes the ex-girlfriend gave him.
24. She still talks with his family members:
If she still talks with his family, it will be hard for them not to keep in touch. Because anything the family reminds him of her, he would just want to call to hear how she is doing.
25. They did not break up officially:
If a breakup was not official, like and separated without properly ending things, these two will still feel something for each other. If they are texting, maybe you are just his other girlfriend, the real girlfriend (supposed ex) that he has an issue with is the one he truly loves.
Is it normal or okay for exes to stay in contact?
It depends on their intentions. But most times, exes stay in touch because they are not over each other. This is why it is seen as unacceptable for exes to contact each other. If you have an ex, when you keep contacting each other, no matter what your intention might be, it will be very difficult for you to move on, even when you are dating someone new. This might create problems for you because you will still be feeling attached to your ex.
However, if you feel you don’t have any feelings for your ex and you are just reaching them to say hi, or for other normal reasons like for the child you had together, then it is okay. But if you don’t have kids or working on any project together, I see no need to always get in touch with your ex, except if you have hidden intentions.
Is it normal for men to talk to their ex?
It is normal if they are just friends, but if you are not okay with it as his partner, he should be able to reduce communication with his ex even if his intentions are pure. You can’t read his mind. He might make you feel like you are being insecure, but almost everyone will feel the same way when their partner is still talking with their exes.
Why does he have his ex-number?
Like we said earlier, if he has kids with her, then he can still have her number. However, for other reasons, he can keep his ex’s number on his phone but won’t contact her. So having the number is not a serious issue, always contacting her is. Moreover, they are exes, not enemies. He might need her for something or just want to say hi because they are just friends now.
Why would an ex contact you?
An ex could contact you for so many reasons. It could be that they have something to tell you, or simply just wanted to hear from you. If you have a child together, an ex can also reach you because of that.
An ex can also contact you if they miss you or when they are trying to get back into your life or have other intentions towards you.
Is reconnecting with an ex worth it?
It may be worth it if things work well. If you feel things will work out with you guys, you can give it a try. A lot of people have talked about going back to their exes and fixing things back together. And others have talked about going back to their ex, as a very big mistake. So it depends on the situation. If you think your ex is worth going back to, then you should go back to them and fix things.
How often do ex-girlfriends come back?
Studies have shown that 30 to 50 percent of exes do come back after a breakup. But this depends on the individual, what caused the breakup, and how serious the relationship was. Though it is more common for guys to come back, ex-girlfriends also come back too.
Is being friends with an ex a red flag?
Being friends with an ex is not always a red flag. It could just be a harmless friendship. What matters is, what you are talking about, and how frequently you are talking with your ex. If you have a partner, you should be able to respect them, especially if they are not okay with you being friends with your ex. And if you feel the urge to always contact your ex, then that’s a red flag, which means you still have feelings for your ex.
How do you tell if a guy still has feelings for his ex?
1. He is constantly contacting her:
When a guy is always talking with his ex, it’s a sign that he still has feelings for her. He might say they are just friends, but the fact they are always talking means he is still obsessed with her.
2. He still has her picture on his phone:
This is another clear sign. Why will anyone keep pictures of their ex on their phones if not to keep looking at them? If he still keeps her pictures, then it’s obvious he still has feelings for her.
3. He calls you by her name a few times:
If your boyfriend has mistakenly called you by his ex’s name, then you should know he still likes his ex. He only calls you by her name because he wishes you were her.
4. He compares you with her:
He will look for reasons to always compare you with his ex. He will say things like, if she was the one, she would not do it this way.
5. You have caught him stalking her:
If you have caught your ex several times looking at his exes’ pictures or going through her pages on social media, then he still has feelings for her.
What to do when he is in contact with his ex?
If your boyfriend is still in contact with his ex, the right thing to do is to talk to him about it. It’s normal to be jealous or unhappy about it. If he was in your shoes, he would feel the same. If they just contact you only a few times, maybe that’s not really a problem, but if they are always texting, then you should talk to him about it, and if he doesn’t want to listen to you, then he doesn’t respect your feelings. You should give him a break since he prefers to text his ex than respect how it makes you feel.
Now you have seen most of the reasons why guys still stay in contact with their ex, even while they are already in a new relationship. Nevertheless, you can’t rightly know what’s going on in this guy’s mind. Even when you ask him, there is no assurance that he will say the truth. However, if he truly values your relationship, he should be able to respect that you are not okay with his friendship with his ex.