In all honesty, the question of how to get a guy to commit can sometimes be a very challenging one.
Take for instance when you meet a guy, you see him as a friend or a lover. You might even see him as the person you’re eager to spend the rest of your life with.
But from your observations, he is not displaying any hints of being serious with you. You start to think of ways of getting him to devote himself to the relationship.
If the goal is to make your man more dedicated, try not to rush things with him. Give him enough care and attention, while resisting the urge to be all over him. If you allow everything to flow naturally, things usually work out for the best.
Here are a few tips to get him to commit
As we all know, getting a wavering partner to become more serious in a relationship is no easy feat. He can only stay if his heart is with you.
You can only force a horse to the stream, but you can’t force it to drink from it. Always remember this.
- Rule number one: Do NOT force things. It never ends well when we try to force things. Endeavor to love yourself more. You are a Queen and MORE. You are more valuable than the value a man places on you.
- Treat him right.
- It’s crucial you also give him enough space–enough of it. Don’t be all over his business every minute of the day. This spectacular quote says it all; “If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it is yours. If it doesn’t, it never was.”
- Don’t be overly demanding.
- Make him know he is the special one.
What makes a man commit to a woman?
There are numerous reasons why a man would want to be fully loyal to a woman. This could be because she is beautiful, her level of intelligence, her sense of humor, etc.
But most men dedicate themselves to women with whom they have a deep connection. A connection he doesn’t feel for any other woman.
He will want to become devoted to a lady when he finds her to be a friend, sister, lover, and a woman he sees a future with. Men get into women who know how to treat them right and give them peace of mind.
Why is it so hard for most men to commit to a relationship?
In general, it is not difficult for men to become seriously devoted to a relationship. Even if it is in a man’s nature to explore, the reasons for lack of dedication can vary from person to person.
A man might feel the need to have his own identity while sharing this bond. He wants a scenario where he can date and still be allowed to live his life without being questioned.
In addition, a man might not want to be in a relationship that requires him to be devoted because of past unfavorable experiences.
Another reason is that they feel that one woman cannot satisfy all their emotional or sexual needs.
He can love you without committing
Men can be into you and also act like he does not want to take you seriously. This can be due to different reasons like we talked about before.
Loyalty is not something you should rush. It has to happen gradually as he gets to know you and gets to feel safe around you.
If he does not commit to you after a while, even if he says and acts as if he loves you, then you have a right to walk away.
You should try this since he is still immature and does not want to be devoted to one person yet. Come to think of it, what is love without dedication?
Why devotion is critical in every relationship
Dedication to a relationship means the relationship is becoming more serious. It means two people are moving from platonic friends to romantic lovers.
With such elevation comes deeper connections, and more closeness. And this new level has some behaviors and expectations that are expected to be met.
Entering into a serious affair with someone means a genuine dedication to that partner. And if the commitment is not genuine, it can lead to problems between both partners in the future.
Developing a successful relationship requires mutual dedication. And this will likely lead to a lifetime of happiness.
How long does it take for a guy to commit?
This depends on the man and the “nature” of the relationship. When friendship advances into a relationship, dedication might come naturally.
Studies suggest it takes approximately six months for a man to make his mind up about being devoted.
Researchers believe that during this six-month period, you must have spent time together. The bond created during this period might also help you understand what kind of person you would like to dedicate yourself to.
Meanwhile, some experts believe there is no fixed time for a man to become devoted to a woman.
Some relationships may start as friends with benefits or as a one-night stand. Eventually, they come together in a beautiful union.
Is it worth waiting for him to commit?
Yes, it is. At the beginning of a relationship, you don’t expect anyone to put in their all. That’s even a red flag if he is acting like he is getting married to you the next day if you just met.
That standalone reason is why you have to give a man time to gradually get into the relationship more seriously.
This does not mean he treats you like he does not care. He will show signs that he loves you and with time you should be able to notice improvements.
But don’t force it. Try talking to him about it. If it looks like you are forcing it, then it’s time to let him go.
Pulling away will make him commit more
Most times when a man doesn’t take you seriously, it might be because he feels he can’t lose you or you can’t do without him.
This is why it is advised that at some point, you act like you don’t care even if you do.
Don’t text, call, or even nag. If he genuinely cares, your absence will make him understand that he must become serious about you.
But if he fails to show any signs and acts like you will invariably come back, then he is not the man for you.
If he is unwilling to commit, do this…
It is stressful if a guy you have deep feelings for or like doesn’t devote himself to you. You might be unclear as to why he is not serious about you. And different reasons might begin to flow in your mind.
Maybe there’s another woman. What am I doing wrong? Is he even ready to dedicate himself to anybody?
If you feel you’ve done everything for him to commit and he’s not doing so, here are three steps you should take:
1. Put him on probation:
Step back and let him miss you. It is a bold step to take because it means you are putting yourself and your happiness first and it matters.
If he comes to you begging and asks you to return, then you know he wants to devote himself to you.
But if he doesn’t try to get you back, then you know he is not the one for you and it’s time to move on.
2. Be free with him:
It’s common for men to worry that once they become fully devoted to one woman, they’ll lose all their freedom forever. Just assure him that you won’t take away his freedom but it will be regulated if he doesn’t want to lose you.
Guarantee him that he will have a life outside the bond even if he devotes himself to you. Be the woman every man wants to have in his life. One that doesn’t try to control the man next to her or change his entire life.
3. Don’t be desperate:
No man will want to fully devote himself to a desperate and nagging woman who keeps yelling about commitment. Instead, approach him and have a decent conversation with him about it. So that you know what to do next.
How do you know he will eventually commit
A man might not do everything you want, but if he loves you and holds you close, he will always reassure you. He will tell you not just by his words but also by his actions and how much you mean to him.
You will see him planning his life in a way that you will fit in. Whether or not he does it now, you will notice he always makes plans for the two of you.
Maybe he is not doing it yet because something is holding him back.
Also, if you have been together for a while you are supposed to have met his circle.
If he plans on taking you seriously, he will introduce you to his friends and family. This might not happen right away, but it should eventually happen.
If he is serious, he will not shy away from meeting your circle. This is another stage you should not rush.
Give him time. Some men might not want to see their families until they feel they are presentable. You have to give him time to build himself to the point where he feels he can see your family now.
You must know that someone who loves you will always find time for you. Don’t allow anyone to give you the excuse that he is too busy.
You can never be too busy for the ones you care about. He might not give you his total attention yet, but he will always check on you and be there for you.
A man who is serious about you will always want to be your hero when he is dating you. So at some point, he would act like a dad and an older brother.
You have to recognize the difference between being protective and being controlling. This will help you not to fall into a toxic relationship.
Relationships are a beautiful thing and finding a partner who is as dedicated to the relationship as you make it even more special.
If you know you’ve found the right man and you want him to commit to you, follow the above steps. These steps are there to guide you on how to do it.
In any case, a man will devote himself if he wants, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to make him serious.
If you try and he still doesn’t want to devote himself to the relationship, remember there are men out there. Find someone who will treat you the way you deserve.