It isn’t strange when people think of their previous lover who they dated ten years ago. Don’t think you are a weirdo for having such thoughts. You aren’t alone on that.
Sometimes, forgetting about your ex is impossible. These are people you might find difficult to forget. Sometimes it could be because you have unfinished business or insecurities.
And sometimes when you think of them it is because they have moved on and you are still finding it difficult to move on.
The way your ex treated you while you guys dated could make you still think of him after ten years. Some guys are very proper and they might have treated you like a queen. And made you feel something you’ve never felt for someone else.
Also, you could be thinking of your ex from ten years ago because he unleashed fire on you. And you are wondering how you found yourself in such a relationship.
In this article, the reasons why you’re still thinking about your ex after ten years will be explained.
Reasons why you’re still thinking about your ex after ten years
If you are still thinking of an old flame after ten years, don’t believe that you have lost your mind. It is okay to occasionally wonder what your old flame is up to. And how they are doing, especially if you guys parted on good terms.
Are you still ruminating about an old flame after a decade? It could be because you are still unable to process your past. And you are having difficulty letting go.
You are still sad about the breakup and it is taking you time to grow and find happiness after the breakup. You may feel like you are missing something. As a result, you are taking your new life for granted while reminiscing about what could have been.
Also, brooding about your past happiness could be one of the reasons why you are thinking of your ex. Because you may feel like you want to be as happy as you guys were before.
Is there anything wrong with thinking about my ex from ten years ago?
This is quite normal. It is not an unusual phenomenon. It is okay to ruminate on the past with fondness and a smile about the memories you shared with that person.
Even though it is okay to brood about your past, you need to keep your thoughts in check. Most times we ruminate about our old flames and wonder if they are happy. If they are at peace and about their general well-being.
Your ex is definitely in your memorabilia and sometimes, an event can open their page in your head. To remember an ex from ten years ago means that he or she made you feel something. The fellow could have made you feel heaven or hell.
Thinking about an old flame could also mean absolutely nothing. Our minds sometimes regurgitate things. It’s the same way we brood about our secondary school classmates after many decades apart.
Don’t fret, you are fine. It’s your mind and you need to take full control of the thoughts when they come.
How to stop brooding about an ex from ten years ago
Breakups are never easy. But ten years is a whole lot of time for you to still be pining for your ex. So here are a few things you can do to stop ruminating about your past.
- Distract yourself:
This may look like the clearest solution. But most times, many people do not see this. When you are ruminating about your old flame, you need to look for something to distract yourself. This is to also take all that excess energy and channel them somewhere else.
Look for a new project to work on it will help get your mind off your ex and help you improve yourself.
- Create boundaries:
The power to control your thoughts rests in your hands. You can control what you think about. But you can do this easily if you set boundaries with your ex-partner.
From the beginning of your breakup, you need to let your ex know that this is what you want and need. Tell them they should not text you or even call you. And this is because the less you hear from them the less you tend to think of them.
- Give yourself time:
When you break up with this old flame, you get the temptation to hold pain in and be strong. But don’t give yourself enough time to cry to heal and feel sad, give yourself time to do whatever you want.
Holding it in and trying to be strong would only cause you to break down. And is a reason why ten years down you begin to pine for your ex because you never gave yourself enough time to heal.
After you end a relationship, it is okay to indulge in yourself. Soak yourself in the bathtub, fix your nails, get your hair done, or do anything at all.
Concentrate on yourself and your well-being. Especially when you find yourself brooding about him. Go to the spa and get that massage to keep your mind off him.
Most times, closure is a word that people use to make you feel better. Because sometimes, nothing your ex says would make you feel better. But most times, we can’t stop brooding about people because we have unresolved issues.
So most times, it is best you meet with your ex and have this lingering discussion to help you find closure. And to enable you to heal properly.
Can exes fall in love again after ten years apart?
The possibility of getting back to your old flame after ten years apart is very high, it happens all the time. Exes getting back together after years apart even after they have dated lots of other people. Most times, if they are meant to be, they always find their way back into each other’s arms.
They take time to grow while apart and learn from their mistakes and maybe this time it will work out. Exes who loved themselves but due to a lot of issues beyond their power might fall in love again after ten years.
For example, if you really loved your ex ten years ago. But couldn’t continue or marry him then because your parents did not consent. Meeting them again can bring back those memories and make you fall all over again.
In life, anything can play out. Love is unpredictable too and it can make you do the unbelievable. If your previous lover still loves you and you share the same emotion, ten years is a short time.
How long does it take to completely forget your ex?
Humans are different, they feel things differently and they heal differently. So there is no time frame as to when you can forget your old flame because people heal differently. You might recover in three months and someone else will forget about their old flame in one year. It is essential that you take as much time as you want to heal properly.
We can’t put a time frame on how people forget their old flame. It’s an unwise thing to do. We can’t forget people who made us feel happy or super sad.
Asking people to completely forget their ex might mean that you want them to stop thinking. Science might be working on a solution to that because that isn’t natural.
Will thinking of my ex of ten years ago affect my current relationship?
You should learn to leave your past in your past. Brooding about your old flame while in an ongoing one will not only hurt you but will end up hurting your partner. And it might lead to comparisons that will hurt your present partner.
Ruminating about your old flame in your current love affair can cut short your joy. It may blind you to your current happiness if you can’t let go of your past unhappiness.
Because you have a sharp mind that can bring back the past doesn’t mean you should embrace the past.
The past is behind us. Your current love affair is your future. Nurture your future and forget about your past.
Ensure you do not make the same mistakes you made in the past in this current love affair. If you dwell too much on your old flame while with your current man, you might regret it. And your current man might soon become your ex.
Focus on your current man and give him your undivided attention.
The reason why you’re thinking of your old flame after ten years could be because you have a sharp mind. Brooding about an old flame from time to time is a good thing.
You can ruminate on your ex with fondness in joy and laugh about it. And sometimes if you need a good cry about it, you can do that as well. All that matters is learning to let go of your past and focus on your future.